Yuck. This is truly the milk of human unkindness


Yuck. This is truly the milk of human unkindness

Almond ‘milk’ melds the sensation of drinking plaster of Paris with the nutritional value of a jelly tot. Amazing

Andrea Burgener

When we moved to a new garden a few years back, I was ecstatic about the large walnut tree. I imagined merry sessions of harvesting, followed by the satisfying conjuring up of walnut-laden meals: pasta with walnuts and cream; walnut and honey pie; walnut dressing. Oh I had a long list in my head, but ignorance is bliss. One season’s “harvest” – if our pathetic haul could be called that – dashed our walnutty aspirations.

Nuts are a bloody nightmare! Well, for urban idiots anyway: the saga of picking them at just the right time (perfectly ripe but not yet mouldy); the stone-age business of shelling them (too much force or force in the wrong spot, and the nut breaks into scraggy bits, half-stuck in the shell’s nooks and crannies); the checking for worms and bugs within the successful lot; the tiny bowl we were left with after hours and hours of work ... all quite disheartening.

I bow down to nut harvesters and farmers now. I get why they cost what they do, even if machinery is involved. I fully understand why there was a time in France when walnuts could be used to pay tithes to the church. Small bag of nuts in exchange for salvation? Sounds fair. ..

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