For a good Claus: What to feed a new-age Santa

Lifestyle

For a good Claus: What to feed a new-age Santa

Forget the eggnog. Here's how you can do your bit to keep health-conscious Santa energised on his big night

Tymon Smith


It’s the night before Christmas and all through the house ... but when the man in the red suit finally makes his appearance complete with his bag of goodies, and still left with hundreds of stops to make, what food would you leave to give him the energy he needs to stay merry on his way?
In an increasingly food- and health-conscious world, are the old milk and biscuits, mince pie and eggnog option still good enough or should we be thinking about some new options for Santa? Options that will cater to his newfound consciousness of what he’s putting in that already overloaded body of his? Here are some suggestions for alternatives that won’t leave the happy present postman feeling bloated and tired after his last delivery has been made.
KALE, KALE AND MORE KALE
A superfood for a super dude – kale is the latest craze among the healthy eaters – high in nutrients, antioxidants, vitamin C, and an aid in the lowering of cholesterol. Also, they sell it at Woolies so it must be good for you, right? With a heavy schedule and a big heart, what better way to help out Santa than to leave him a healthy combo of kale chips with a kale, cucumber, wheatgrass smoothie thrown in for good measure? He’ll be full of the joys of vitamins and green stuff, and plenty energised for his further travels.
BANTING BREAKFAST AND BUBBLY
Santa first became aware of the Banting craze a few years ago when it seemed as if every Christmas stocking from Parkhurst to Constantia had to contain a copy of The Real Meal Revolution. Intrigued, he took a copy home to Mrs Claus, but she wasn’t convinced and so he dropped the idea of adopting a high-fat, low-carb diet. However, over the years he’s been known to like to sneak in the odd Banting breakfast. A little bacon, a little sausage and eggs with a side of rocket all cooked in coconut oil of course and served with a glass of bubbly should do the trick to ensure that Santa gets his fix of the diet craze, if not its long-term benefits.
PALEO PLATTER
Santa’s a relatively modern creation so he wasn’t around during the time of our prehistoric ancestors. However, he’s not averse to trying new things, so if you want to convince him of the benefits of the Paleo diet’s adherence to prehistoric eating habits perhaps a lean cut of buffalo served with some asparagus, pumpkin and nuts with a side of mango sorbet might do the trick. Leave a motivational note though, as experts do like to remind us that our ancestors didn’t just eat better, they exercised more in their daily lives too. So one night on a sleigh just won’t cut it if Mr Claus hopes to see the benefits.
VEGAN SURPRISES
Depending on how much of a vegan you are, the idea of a man who rides a sled pulled by reindeer and who likes to stomp around in a pair of leather boots may mean that you’re more inclined to block off the chimney than let him in. If you do have a heart, though, and want to use this annual visit to try to convert the jolly man to your eating habits, why not start with some of the increasingly tasty meat substitute products that the vegan world has to offer? They’re surprisingly good. A plate of vegan biltong, some vegan boerie and a glass of beetroot juice may just entertain his palette long enough for you to sneak out and free Rudolph and his crew from the yoke of festive fascism.

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