FEAR AND CLOTHING: Next lady for a shave? Count me in

Lifestyle

FEAR AND CLOTHING: Next lady for a shave? Count me in

A weekly column on the vagaries and charms of fashion

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I succumbed and bought a pair of boots on sale. The sale, I imagine, was brought on by our apparent backslide into economic gloom. Twenty South African rand to the Brexit pound is pretty damning – so much for the Cyril effect. High-end stores all over SA are on 70% sale – if that doesn’t tell you something, this story I am about to relate will.
The boots in question are be-tasseled – they look like a lovechild of the Wild West, cowboy meets Indian (please forgive all culturally offensive implications). I bought them in the thick of sale frenzy and wore them immediately. The feedback was mixed. Primarily the verdict was bleak and of the shaving variety. #Thetasslemustfall.
I persevered and wore them again to a party, where I observed a fellow tassel acolyte. Standing in an all-girl focus group on the “shave, don’t shave” question I pointed out the fellow traveller and said something along the lines of “one is an island but two is a tribe”.
Unfortunately said fellow traveller saw me mid-flow and immediately suspected the worst. “Are you being mean, girls?” she asked. “No,” we cried in unison – but too late; it all looked way too suspiciously high school for comfort. Also, who can really believe that the conversation had sunk to such depths?
Spare me the judgment, all you higher-order thinkers. One tasseled boot represents so many larger questions about life and the state of the nation. In summary: sisterhood, stagflation and cultural appropriation in one fell sale. That’s it – I’m shaving!

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