Six reasons to follow Baddie Winkle

Lifestyle

Fear and Clothing

Six reasons to follow Baddie Winkle

A weekly foray into the vagaries and charms of fashion

Columnist

1. She is bad and she is winkle.  This nonagenarian ( real name Helen Ruth Elam van Winkle)  is a fabulous bird of paradise living her best life in rainbow-hued splendour, and a giant dose of not giving a flying (insert suitable copulating expletive here). She smokes, she drinks, she has a way with a double entendre and I bet she slays on the bingo floor. Don’t mess with the Baddie, because unlike her namesake – Rip van Winkle – she has most definitely not been asleep for the better part of a century, nor does she seem like she could RIP anytime soon.2. She is the antidote to Donald Trump if you are looking for someone of that generation to aspire to in old age. If  you spent the past week getting even more depressed about the impending state of doom, more so after listening to Barrack Obama celebrating Madiba on Tuesday,  then a shot of Baddie will lift the spirits and temporarily create diversion from horrible persistent thoughts like:  How far we have come in one short year;  What is to become of liberal democracy in the face of this total onslaught by a yellow baby blimp and the rest of the autocratic fraternity of jerks?; How can I pop the baby blimp?; Is Melania an automatom who was purchased in Stepford, Connecticut?3.  She has basically taken up residence in  Ru Paul’s wardrobe and she is supremely happy in there.  Her Instagram feed is a confection of cotton candy on LSD. The sugar rush is real.4. She is not Elon Musk’s mother. Maye Musk is bloody scary – supremely beautiful in her dotage and responsible for Elon. She pushed him out in Pretoria and now he is harassing people on Twitter about his long pointy submarine.5. Baddie is not averse to the healthful benefits of  medicinal marijuana – you could do worse in this world than take her advice.6. She has been “Stealing your man since 1928”.

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