Manspreading is as old as feline disdain for attractive silicone

My boycat Jimmy is fond of manspreading. If you haven’t heard this term  before (where have you been?) it means the splaying apart of one’s legs in total confidence that no one would dare to violate what lies between them. 

This is an enviable practice that seems peculiar to males of their species. Jimmy’s twin sister Dave would never dream of laying herself open in such a vulnerable and undignified fashion.

“Manspreading” is a word that was added to the Oxford English Dictionary in August 2015. That’s just five years ago for anyone who doesn’t feel like counting backwards on their fingers...