I’m not a dog person, but things have turned a bit Rosie

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I’m not a dog person, but things have turned a bit Rosie

When I say this pup is extraordinary, you need to know that I am offering you a cold scientific analysis

I want you to know that I’m not a dog person. I’m not a cat person either. I get that people like pets, but I don’t really. I’m not a psychopath, I don’t think – I’m sure if I had a pet I would love it too, if it were sufficiently lovable, and I know that would be very nice and very rewarding, but none of that strikes me as being reason enough to actually get a pet, with all the expense and effort and curtailment of personal freedom that would entail. I guess for me pets are a bit like children.

So when I tell you about Rosie, I want you to understand that I am not being sentimental. It is not my default setting to be moved by ragged, homeless, odd-looking mutts that come knocking at my front door. When I say Rosie is extraordinary, you need to know that I am offering you a cold scientific analysis. These are the facts I’m giving you.

Rosie walked up to my door earlier this week. She is about eight months old, I would guess, and is pitch black and has a long, pointed face that no one would describe as objectively attractive. “Rosie” is short for “Rosenberg”, as in Ethel and Julius Rosenberg. Do you remember the two spies in Spy vs Spy in Mad magazine? The black spy and the white spy? She looks like the black spy...

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