Shock! Horror! Yawn ... so are the days of the SABC’s life

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Shock! Horror! Yawn ... so are the days of the SABC’s life

The 'Bold and the Beautiful' may be gone. but there will always be plenty of melodrama at the SABC

Columnist


Eskom schmeskom. You want concrete proof that SA is still teetering on the brink? On Monday the SABC canned The Bold and the Beautiful.
Many local fans would argue that the broadcaster has failed to see the Forrester for the trees: cancelling the enormously popular soap may yet prove to be a Ridge too far for viewers who felt the show was Taylor-made for them and who will now Storm away or Sally forth to other channels. (That’s the last of them, I promise.)
Explaining the move, which felt as misjudged as that time Ashley Abbott from Rustelose Jare showed up in The Bold, the broadcaster announced that it had axed the show because of “the property’s poor return on investment whilst the financial investment to acquire the property kept increasing”.
The irony of a bloated cash-parasite axing something on these grounds was more on the nose than Brooke talking aloud to her mirror, listing the pros and cons of marrying Ridge for the seventh time. But, to mix metaphors horribly, so are the days of the SABC’s life.
Still, there is hope for those who want a daily dose of melodrama, because less than 24 hours after the show left SA forever, members of parliament began interviewing potential SABC board members. Shock! Horror! Technocrats!
According to reports, 24 candidates are applying to fill eight vacancies. This seems like a fair ratio, given that in my experience the SABC usually employs three people to do the job of one deep-sea sponge. (This is, after all, the building where I once saw a motivational poster on a wall that read: “The only thing worse than having a job is not having a job.”)
But wait! Just as the lovers are about to kiss the patio doors are flung open and they are confronted by the brooding menace of ... Cosatu! Right on cue, the union demanded that the interview process be stopped because there was nobody representing labour. This was a very fair complaint: labour is a largely alien concept at Auckland Park.
Moments later, another shock: super-villain ANC, wearing nothing but a tiara crafted out of 18-carat corruption, demands a delay, presumably because it thought there would be sausage rolls at the interview and so far there’s only bottled water ...
And so it goes. Will the eight posts be filled? Will they be filled with humans or the fart-catchers the ANC has been cloning in its underground lair? Will the new appointees resign within days, or will they last a full week? Will any of it matter?
Tune in next year, or the year after, or maybe in five or six, and catch up on the story within a few minutes. Because soap operas never really change, do they?

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