Ja well, no spine: gutless ANC owes Zuma, carrier of our sins

Ideas

Ja well, no spine: gutless ANC owes Zuma, carrier of our sins

The party faithful have much in common with the spineless lot behind the 'quiet resistance' in Trump's White House

Columnist


Gutless. That's what Donald Trump, the Lying Sack of Fanta, called an anonymous op-ed column in Wednesday’s New York Times, allegedly written by a gatvol White House insider.
These days most rational adults are ignoring the tweets that pour out of the gold-leafed crèche that is the Trump administration. This tweet, however, might be worth taking more seriously. After all, as a dodger of drafts, a hider of tax returns and an avoider of London protests, Trump knows a great deal about being gutless.
Certainly, whoever wrote the piece about belonging to a “quiet resistance within the administration” is managing to eat their cake and have it: decrying Trump’s “amorality” while expressing pride in this administration’s agenda (targeting women’s right to govern their own bodies, tax breaks for the rich, rolling back environmental protection, pouring money into the arms industry, alienating Western Europe and emboldening Russia and North Korea) seems a tad rich.
Luckily, this could never happen in SA. We will never have to fret over the identity and motives of a secret resistance in government. That’s because when the ANC wants to distance itself from ANC mismanagement, it just calls a press conference and declares that, as the ANC, it condemns the ANC for being the ANC.
It’s been happening for months; the invertebrates of the Zuma era suddenly pretending to grow a spine and telling us that they never liked what was happening. Or that they didn’t know it was happening: in June, for example, the ANC told us it was “shocked” by the extent of corruption in the state.
On Thursday it happened again.
According to Business Day, the ANC’s head of economic transformation, Enoch Godongwana, says that political mismanagement under Zuma was the cause of our current economic “mess”.
Well, yes. But thank God that’s all over now, right? Thank heavens the post-Zuma ANC is completely reformed, right? Not a crony in sight, yes? Ah, what a relief.
It’s quite miraculous, when you think about it. You and I and the ANC would agree that some evils take decades or even centuries to exorcise. Poverty, racism, violence and poor education, for example, all have effects that echo relentlessly from one generation to the next.
But the ANC’s deeply entrenched culture of corruption? Its pathological inability to accept responsibility for any current failings? Its addiction to Big Men protected by Small Men? Gone! Poof! Vanished in a flash of rainbow sparkles, the moment Zuma resigned.
Because it was all him, don’t you see? Every time the ANC faithful chose party over country, it was because Zuma had a gun to their head! Well, okay, not a gun. A wad of money. But it’s still scary having money pressed to your head. You can get paper cuts.
All those times they enabled Zuma, it wasn’t because they wanted to, see? In 2015, when current New Dawners Cyril Ramaphosa, Jeff Radebe, Blade Nzimande, Naledi Pandor, Derek Hanekom, Edna Molewa, Aaron Motsoaledi, Susan Shabangu and Lindiwe Sisulu all voted against Zuma having to pay back the money for Nkandla, it wasn’t a giant Fuck You to South Africa. It was “quiet resistance within the administration”, like that person who works for Donald Trump! See the difference? It’s not collaboration if you don’t like the guy!
Yes, thank God for Jacob Zuma, carrier of all the ANC’s sins. I hope the gutless wonders thank him in their prayers every day.

This article is reserved for Times Select subscribers.
A subscription gives you full digital access to all Times Select content.

Times Select

Already subscribed? Simply sign in below.

Questions or problems?
Email helpdesk@timeslive.co.za or call 0860 52 52 00.

Next Article

Previous Article